A Compassionate Voice for the Parents of Children with Hidden Disabilities
Melanie Boudreau
  • Blog
  • About
  • Book
  • Relational Guidelines
  • Workshop
  • Contact

Everyday Miracles

11/17/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
I had one job. To get my grandchildren to school on time this morning. The careful list of instructions left by my daughter spelled it out clearly.

“Leave the house by 7:15 am.”

I am clever. I remember the ordeal a simple task of loading the car can be. We stepped out the door at 7 am sharp with the idea fifteen minutes to load would be ample. Silly me. It’s been too long. I should have started at 3 am.

The Boston Terrier escaped when the door opened, which was no big deal because she self-potties and runs back to the door. Unless there is a raccoon in the yard. She took off like a bat out of hell and disappeared into the woods.

First the children went in hot pursuit— but to no avail. They were impressed how their skittish dog penetrated the forest with no reserve. Then it was my turn. Into the woods I went.

Looking up, I spotted Olive’s obsession in the branch over my head. Leash in hand, eventually I corralled our domesticated crazed beast and coaxed her out of the brush and back into civilization. Enough adventure for one day— these kids must get to school!

Buckled back in, I press the ignition.

“Key fob not found.”

I am holding the fob in my hand. This is a push button ignition. Ugh!!! Ok, there is an emergency manual key hidden in every fob — I extract it and look for the insertion slot.

Dashboard. No. Under the cup holder. No. In the storage bay. No. Dash again. No. By my knees. No. Ugh!!! My grandson Brave mentions the penalties levied against him for arriving late.

Ugh.

Quick thinking, my beloved searches google “Mazda Fob Reset” and gets the vehicle to respond to the fob. Off we go! Thank you, Grandpa!

I do not know my way around Nashville. But I am quick with my GPS and equipped with the address pre-loaded. Only upon arriving at the first spaghetti junction, the options the program presented me did not match the road signs. Each road may have 4 names, but only a local can supply the names not present on the sign overhead. And I am no local.

Pulling off in heavy traffic, I switch programs and the alternate app chooses a route actually represented by signage. How was I to know it was a fifteen minute diversion to make a loop back around? And loop we did.

I prayed for a miracle- a teleportation wonder where somehow we pull into car line right on time. That miracle did not happen. My grandchildren were late to school this morning, my first day behind the wheel of their parenting, entrusted with their precious lives.

But a miracle had taken place, over a number of years actually. The miracle of being able to remain calm under pressure, the miracle of not accepting the shame offered me after failure. The miracle of seeing the humor in circumstances real time, even when the outcome feels like it makes me look bad. The miracle of being present and loving life and being connected to the God of the universe who is smiling at me as I navigate loving well in the midst of stress.
​
Rescue comes in the form of a Person— through Divine camaraderie and empowerment. Today, in the midst of your own story, receive His provision and watch the same miracles unfold.
0 Comments

Come and Drink

6/2/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
My body needs water. I cannot get away from its daily demands. In my kitchen I gulp a few sips to down my supplements. I grab a bottle from my garage on my way out the door. My coffee has water in it. Surely that counts? 

My routine consumption rarely approaches the eight to nine glasses a day recommended by health professionals. I run a constant deficit, staying on the verge of dehydration. 

Why? 

Water is continuously available to me. It is canned and sparkling in my fridge, Colorado-fresh and free-flowing out my spigot, melodious in the creek by my home. Majestic in the expanse of wind-churned peaks across the surface of a nearby lake.  Thunderous and powerful over the falls. Thoroughly drenching from the skies. There is no lack of water in its availability to me. 

Even so, I barely quench my thirst when there is nothing else as refreshing or satisfying as water. 

I awoke this morning to Holy Spirit’s invitation to recognize His offer to drink deeply. My thirst is not met by His ubiquitous nature; it is met by my intentional consumption of Him. Not a sip here and there, not a gulp along with supplements, not my morning hot brew to awaken me for my day. His offer is saturation, steeping, ingesting, filling myself with Him. On cool days and scorchers alike. 

I need Him.
0 Comments

Good News for You

12/25/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
On the afternoon of Christmas Eve, I slipped into the restroom at the Dallas Fort Worth airport between flights. After washing my hands, I noted the custodian standing nearby, so as is my custom, I slowed down to make eye contact, smile, and thank her for her labors. However, when my eyes connected with hers, I became startled by the depth of sadness and grief she could not conceal. It was so unnerving, I had to catch my breath, quickly slipping past her after a cursory greeting.

Scenarios flooded my mind— who has she lost? What does this year represent for her? Is she alone this Christmas? Does she have a disabled child? Is she a caregiver? What are her fears? I found myself wishing I had an extra hundred dollar bill tucked away I could slip into her hand, but I did not. And her pain seemed untouchable, almost cheapened by suggesting mere cash could allay it. But I was grasping, wishing I had a way to help. I kept walking, haunted by the glimpse into her soul. I do not always know what to do, say or even pray.

​This is a hard year for many. Too hard.

As I post my holiday greetings and pictures of family, I am acutely aware many are struggling, some feeling utterly alone.

​Many are aware God appeared on earth clothed in flesh, his coming providing mankind a model to live by. Others may realize Jesus came as a man without sin in order to pay the price for the wrong each of us have done, qualified to do so by His own perfection. He makes forgiveness possible. A just God requires accountability; a loving God bore the price for it Himself on a cross.

But few recognize the purpose of Jesus’ miraculous appearance was to restore us to God relationally, so we could live in union with our Creator, a good, good, God.

Union. Bliss. Intimacy.

These are not words we typically hear applied to the Christian faith, and yet, this is the purpose and goal of Christ’s work upon the Earth: to destroy the works of the evil one (who labors to isolate man from God), to speak the Truth of reconciliation and connection with God, and to restore mankind to His side as companions. He calls us friend!

This is the Good News.

No matter what circumstances we face, He will never leave us or forsake us. He is so committed to us, His people are inscribed on the palms of His hands.

I thought you might need some good news as we end out 2020 and enter a new year, not alone after all.

Happy New Year!
0 Comments

Good News

7/30/2020

2 Comments

 
Picture
It is vacation time, for what we could muster in a state hopping with COVID and our personal losses mounting on several fronts. To complement the restorative glory of our seaside rental, our daughter and grans joined us for two weeks.

I dropped my girl and the kids off at the Orlando airport last night. Headed back to the condo I passed through a log jam caused by five fire trucks and one of the most horrible wrecks I have ever seen. On a darkened stage pelted by rain, there were 10-15 emergency personnel gathered in a circle, holding hands with heads bowed. Not a single fireman was working the wreck.

Sacred. And deeply moving.

Someone died. Perhaps a whole family. And someone else got that horrible news last night.

Horrible news is becoming the norm in a way that threatens to shake us to our core. I do not welcome death and loss, but I do welcome the unseating of everything in my life masquerading as security in a world where true Security can only be found in the Person of Jesus Christ. I am inviting God to use global and exclusive plights to spotlight this truth for me with greater clarity, to refresh my God orientation with Him in His rightful place.

Everyday life’s demands attempt to take Jesus off center-stage. To replace Him with urgencies, plans for reconfigurations to win back homeostasis in our lives, to coronate a false security that looks more like control and predictability than yieldedness to our wild God.

We need Jesus now more than ever. In Jesus there is peace. In Jesus we endure losses knowing there is coming a glorious restoration of all things. In Jesus there is healing and Hope.

Because of Christ, in a time of great pain, we have comfort to give others. (II Corinthians 1:4) ​With so much bad news, we have Good News to share. (I Corinthians 15:1)
2 Comments

Diversion or Immersion?

7/8/2020

2 Comments

 
Picture
​Some mornings I wake up acutely aware I am a child of God, eager to meet with Him. Before I even open my eyes, I tune in, surveying the landscape of my consciousness, to study my last dream, or to perceive if a new idea has been dropped into my spirit.

​I ask questions of God and consecrate myself and my day anew to Him. The palette of my mind is clear in the mornings, with no brush strokes to obscure the messages the Holy Spirit offers me at the start of each day. 

​Some mornings. 
Other mornings I awaken unaware, grab my phone and paralyze my mind scrolling through social media, emails, and text messages that came in during the night. The noise wipes clean my perceptions of the Divine, my sensitivity to His subtle whispers. 

Coffee. Coffee, please. 

One morning I can feel so connected, and the next, as though my day has started and this faith walk gets compartmentalized, relegating my interaction with Jesus to the confines of an appointment later in the day. 

Awareness of patterns is half the battle. Take inventory! 

The truth is, it is only in Christ "we live, and move and have our being". (Acts 17:28 NIV) Apart from Him, we can do nothing. Only connection with Jesus can produce the kind of fruit we want from our day or really even from our lives. (John 15:4-5) My life is not my own; it is not up to me to direct my own steps. (Jeremiah 10:23) And when I try, through omission, I lose ground. 

Now more than ever, with each day bringing new chaos, we must commune, connect, pursue, and draw near to our God. Our lives are designed to be an experience of immersion in Him, every moment of every day. As you draw near to Him, He promises to draw near to you! (James 4:8) 

Do not wait. Can you feel the urgency of the hour?
2 Comments

Open-Spigot Living

6/25/2020

2 Comments

 
Picture
I am in the middle of a bathroom remodel project, the kind of vast under-taking that guts a room and slowly rebuilds it into a place of beauty. I contracted out most of the work, like the shower demolition, re-tiling, and custom wood butcher-block counters. But I have professional-level painting skills. 

For days I have sanded cabinets, primed, and painted. Yesterday I finally finished prepping the walls and ceiling and began the arduous task of painting the room. By the time I am ready to clean my equipment and brushes, typically in the middle of the night, I am utterly exhausted. You know how projects go. 

If a quality paintbrush is not cleaned properly, it dries stiff and hard and becomes useless. It takes time to clean it properly. A thorough cleaning requires copious amounts of running water— a stagnant bucket of water will not do. A painter then uses a dual-sided tool; a metal, sharp-pronged comb on one side, paired with a metal brush similar to a barbecue grill brush on the other side. 

I use the metal brush to repetitively scratch the exterior of the paintbrush’s ferrule stroking down the bristles under a running sink facet until the brush looks clean. But a mere squeeze reveals my brush is still full of paint! The efficient way to rid the brush of the paint is to use the sharp prongs of the metal comb to pierce the brush starting at the heel, splaying the bristles, and raking repetitively through the belly and toe of the brush, all the while under the gushing spigot. This method exposes the interior bristles to the cleansing flow until the brush is squeezed and the emerging water runs clear. Last night while rinsing my brushes, I accidentally pierced my finger with the sharp prongs of the cleaning comb, commingling my blood with the freshly flowing water and fading paint. 

​Can you see where I am going with this description? We can be raked and pierced by life’s assaults all day long and not benefit in the slightest. But God has a divine purpose behind the hardships we face in this life. With the spigot running continuously, He restores us during the transformation process if we position ourselves in Him. 

"I cannot have a new room without enduring the chaos and the cleaning."
I want the fruit of my remodeled lavatory, but I do not look forward to the chaos of dismantling existing structures or to cleaning my brushes. I cannot have a new room without enduring the chaos and the cleaning. Our lives are the same way. I want my life and character to be transformed by God, becoming beautiful. But the project is one of demolition and yielding to a thorough cleaning for me to emerge as hoped. 

My life and yours too require copious amounts of free-flowing Water, running constantly, to cleanse the compacted strands of our life stories  — both the washing of the water of the Word and abiding in the Spirit immersed in the River of Life. A bucket of water captured in a quick morning devotion will just not suffice. The flow of His presence must be constant. The more Water, the better! 

And it takes a good piercing under that flow to expose what is hidden. Prayers to abort the process do not yield a life usable in the hands of the Master Painter. Instead, apply more Water and benefit fully from the raking, embracing God's divine purpose and provision. Visualize the brush with each squeeze of the bristles in your Master's hand! 

Drawing blood last night created in my mind’s eye what really has to happen. It is the piercing of Jesus Christ, His blood, His cleansing flow applied to my life that leaves me restored, supple for use. And the bathroom? It is still a work in progress, but it is coming along beautifully!
2 Comments

Choose Well

9/17/2017

1 Comment

 
Picture
In a deep sleep, I imagined sounds too near my tent, like brushing against its sides. I began to ask myself if it could be a bear, or perhaps a man with dubious intent.
​On occasion I like to camp alone, a time when I can pray and worship immersed in nature. Praise isn't something I'm supposed to do, rather, it's something I can't help myself from doing, like gasping at a glorious sunrise. The more I experience God in His goodness, sustaining me, even rescuing me, the more amazed I become by Him.

​Last night I worshipped under the stars nestled by a creek from my tiny Mtn Glo Tent, and pondered King Solomon. We all remember how God offered Solomon anything, and he chose wisdom, greatly pleasing God. What is easy to forget however, is that the entire exchange happened in a dream. And yet it was real. As I drifted to sleep, I asked Holy Spirit if He would speak to me that night in a dream as well, and if I too could choose wisely in a way that would honor Him.
My freeze dried food was in my backpack, leaning into the zippered screen door covered by the rain fly. In a deep sleep, I imagined sounds too near my tent, like brushing against its sides. I began to ask myself if it could be a bear, or perhaps a man with dubious intent.

​Then I felt pressure along my side, as though something large had nuzzled against the tent wall, accompanied again by the swooshing sound against the nylon. I thought for a second perhaps it's my husband who has found me; he was at a men's retreat on the main campus nearby. Immediately I realized he would never be walking through these woods at night.


Then I remembered that I had invited Holy Spirit to commune with me, for God's presence to be tangible. So I smiled, rolled over and melted into an awareness of Him and his peace. No fear. In the face of very plausible concern, I quickly re-entered the deepest level of sleep.

So this morning I packed my tent and headed back to the ranch. The director casually mentioned they had found evidence of a bear last night at the far end of the camp, down by the creek. I had to laugh.

It was a dream, and yet it was real. Best of all, like Solomon, in my sleep I chose well. And God respects the choices we make while we are dreaming.

When faced with very real concern when awake, may we all choose Him, recognizing how incredibly near He truly is.
1 Comment

Rapids Ahead

7/12/2017

3 Comments

 
Picture
"The Lord is with you, O valiant warrior."
​- Judges 6:12 (KJV)
Yesterday I kayaked a section of the Savanah River in Augusta, GA. I have zero kayaking skills. Even so, my host graciously indulged me. It's definitely my idea of a good time.

The river is broad and strewn with rocks, and in places there are roars suggestive of waterfalls ahead. My host kayaking behind me assured me otherwise, but even Class 1 rapids can dump a kayak if wedged sideways, or otherwise stuck.

I could feel my stomach tense up, my adrenaline release, and my determination focus as I led our path through uncertain waters.

The Father's Assurance in the Midst of Challenges

The moment I emerged into the calm, my phone rang.

​I took a deep breath of relief with risk behind me, and answered.

On the line was one of the heavy hitters I took with me last month for Kingdom expansion pioneering work in North Borneo. She related that God spoke my name to her, and directed her to call me with an immediate message:

"I see you as the trophy. You are victorious. You are fully capable. You are well equipped. You are a leader. He is so pleased with you. Again, you are the trophy...you are His champion."

I was stunned. Timing is everything.

Then last night, as I'm sharing with my host my vision for founding a non-profit to bring autism intervention to developing nations, discussing setting up the board, the same feeling hit my stomach: rapids ahead, uncertainty, a mission seemingly without the skill set, but determination.

Immediately the affirming word returned, "His trophy, His champion, victorious, capable, equipped". His word had imprinted, and now is triggered with the internal feeling I get when approaching rapids in a kayak.


I thought of Gideon threshing his wheat while hiding from his enemies in a vat. God addressed him as "O valiant warrior!" And truly he was.

What rapids are you approaching that turn your stomach a bit, that threaten to tumble you upon the rocks?

​Listen intently for the affirmation God is poised to speak into your spirit at that very moment, to imprint upon you that indeed, you've got this. He is with you with every thrust of your oar.
3 Comments

Let Patience Have Its Perfect Work

2/10/2016

2 Comments

 
Picture
But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.  - James 1:4
I’m in the Philippines this month teaching at pastors' conferences with a powerhouse team of dynamic women, all older and wiser than me.

Today was supposed to have been a routine, island-hopping jaunt by ferry to Bohol Island where we were scheduled to speak in the evening at a conference.

Like the woman in the photo stranded on the roadside, my day turned out to be a day filled with patience-testing circumstances. How I reacted revealed something in me.

Travel Delays, Stormy Seas, Shifting Priorities

Our ferry from Negros Island to Bohol Island was delayed for several hours, and concern arose for our ability to fulfill our commitment to speak that evening. Any changes could also impact the next day's schedules.

The journey before us involved a rough sea crossing. ​The two Dramamine pills I took were making me terribly sleepy as we waited ad nauseum in the hot, cramped, pre-loading staging area at the docks.

Can you say "Dramamine"?
​As we headed toward the rocking craft to board, my travel companions began throwing out ideas for rescuing the sabotaged conference speaking schedule. 
  • “Melanie could take tonight’s session while we sleep!“ 
    Me: 
    “Ok.” 

  • “Melanie could give up her plenary tomorrow to make up for lost time!”
    Me: “That works.” 

    (Peals of laughter ensued.)


  • ​“Doesn’t anything ruffle your feathers?” one friend playfully chided. 

​​Not much.

And believe me, not getting frustrated is not in my “natural” temperament.

Patience, Tolerance and Perseverance

The truth is, raising children with hidden disabilities, precious wonderful children that are incredibly trying and who cause us to die to ourselves every...single...day of our lives, produces lovely fruit of patience, tolerance and perseverance. 

All of the peace I cried out for in my prayers during the most trying seasons of child raising, I have now, not because my babies are near grown, but because peace can be internal independent of agitators or circumstances.

You are not just molding your children. Your children are molding you, and its a beautiful thing. ​
2 Comments

Choose Your Weapon

1/13/2016

1 Comment

 
Picture
Much truth has been written about positive thinking and its power to change the way we act. Even so, the power of positive thinking is a watered down weapon of warfare against Satan, a dull sword in a combatant’s hands against a lethal enemy who will stop at nothing less than your annihilation. Your greatest spiritual weapon of offense is not positive thinking but the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God (Ephesians 6:17). With it in your mind and heart, as well as on your lips, you are able to stand firm when the enemy on the outside or the lies within attack.

At times I feel isolated and cut off from God’s restorative presence. When these times come, I combat the lie of helplessness with the sword of truth, which says I am the temple of God whose Spirit lives in me twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, regardless of circumstances (1 Corinthians 3:16). When I am attacked with the lie that today’s failures make me particularly odious to God, my sword strikes back with the sharp-edged declaration that my life is “a Christ-like fragrance rising up to God” (2 Corinthians 2:15).\
​
You see, time spent reading and meditating on the Word of God is not merely a spiritual discipline or one more brick to add to your trudging load, another area where you can fall under its weight. Instead, consuming the Word provides nourishing truth and life to your innermost being, life that defeats the lies of the enemy.


From Toppling the Idol of Ideal: Raising Children with Hidden Disabilities, Chapter 4, The Battle. 
1 Comment
<<Previous

    RSS Feed

    Picture

    About Melanie

    Two of our three children have Tourette's Syndrome as well as a few other co-morbidities, inherited neuropsychiatric disorders. I'm still happily married, love life and want to share encouragement bringing hope, humor and insight into the process of raising children who are different. 

    Archives

    February 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    November 2019
    July 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    November 2018
    July 2018
    December 2017
    September 2017
    July 2017
    February 2017
    December 2016
    August 2016
    May 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    June 2015
    March 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    October 2014
    August 2013
    May 2013
    February 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012

    Categories

    All
    504
    Accommodations
    Adhd
    Affliction
    Angels
    Anger
    Anxiety
    Assurance
    Attention Deficit Disorder
    Authority
    Autism
    Beauty
    Behavior
    Book
    Boundaries
    Bullying
    Camaraderie
    Challenges
    Change
    Child
    Children
    Church
    Coaching
    Comfort
    Community
    Courage
    Cuba
    Declaration
    Depression
    Empathy
    Encouragement
    Expectations
    Faith
    Family
    Glory
    Grief
    Healing
    Hidden Disabilities
    Hiking
    Home School
    Hope
    Identity
    Iep
    Intercession
    Internal Dialog
    Intervention
    Intimacy
    Job
    Judgment
    Life
    Local Help
    Loss
    Mainstream
    Mental Health
    Mental Illness
    Miracles
    Mother
    NeedProject.org
    Pain
    Parenting
    Personal Development
    Personal Responsibility
    Perspective
    Podcast
    Prayer
    Psychiatric Hospital
    Raising Childen
    Remaining Calm
    Resources
    Restoration
    School
    Self-diagnosis
    Sensory
    Shame
    Social Media
    Special Education
    Stigma
    Suicide
    Support
    Tourette Syndrome
    Transitions
    Undiagnosed Mental Illness
    Unrighteous Judgments
    Warfare

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
Photos from James Cridland, anneh632, Joshua Siniscal Photography, quali-T